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The Secret To A Successful Relationship

 

With all that’s going on in the world these days, it’s kinda alarming to notice that large numbers of people are less experienced in real-life relationships. And it becomes more clear when we look around and see the amounts of break-ups and divorces around us. Some of us might have already been in such an experience. somehow, it seems tricky to figure out how to start and maintain a healthy and successful relationship. But why is it that hard?

The ways we’ve thought about and approached relationships have changed profoundly over the past several years. We’ve evolved from a hierarchical and hierarchically determined view of society to a new model whose intention is to see every individual as being equal. We’ve given up on the idea that there’s something unique about “one good person” and started to look for what we share with each other instead. We think about the ways that we communicate with others in a different way, too. With the rise of the internet and social media, relationships have become much more real-time (artificial). There’s a lot more “plugging in” and sharing and commenting which is -in big parts- “anonymously”. In contrast to the old ways of writing a letter, which made you overthink, reconsider, oversleep and refine your words. However, it’s all being done within a new set of definitions and rules, and people have to relearn what it means to be good communicators and how to perceive and understand messages in the first place.

For a successful relationship, you’ll need to learn how to deal with your partner’s (or anyone else’s) anger, jealousy, and mistrust, plus how to make sure you’re still talking and romancing your mate when your kids are ready to fly the coop.

It’s really not easy to make a relationship work, and while the tips for a successful relationship sound pretty sound, you have to remember that they are all essential because your relationship is the foundation upon which everything else you do in life is built. And with a strong foundation, you have a happier, healthier life with your partner.

We can have strong, healthy and successful relationships. The fact is that relationships are extremely complex, and you need to make the most of them. The secret to making this happen? one little shift in the way you look at them. One little shift that might make a huge difference. That little shift that changes everything.

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Theater of Childhood & Life (3)

My toys and watching anime was my biggest concern. I still remember the animes that I always loved to watch but are no longer shown on TV today, (Captain Tsubasa), (Sanchiro), and (Friendship Oath). Each one of them has a special effect that was left in my soul. I wished that I would play the ball as Captain Tsubasa does. And my dream was to be creative with computers like Sanchiro. And I dream of a pure, beautiful, happy friendship. Despite everything, I was not tired or exhausted from running and playing every day on the roof of our building, and the harmony between me and my friends was like a strange innate link, and nothing else nor any other person had a presence between us. When we gather, we separate from the outside world as if we are not in it at all.

We had our own style in which we created a solution to the problems between us. We divided ourselves into three groups. The members of each group chose a name for their group, so Mazin and Zizo chose (Detective Conan)  as the name for their group, Hussam and Ahmed chose (Thunderstorm) as the name for their group,  As for me, along with Shehab, we called our group (Sanshiro). Every member of his group was active, while I excelled in football,  Shehab was excelling in escaping in the game (police and thieves), and while Mazin was a great goalkeeper, Zizo was the best in the game (hide and seek), and as Hussam excelled in paying goals, Ahmed was distinguished in wrestling.

We played every game, even if we didn’t excel in it, because we each relied on our companion in the group and trusted them blindly. But we were not contentious about the game we want to play, as each of us wants others to play their favorite game, and we used to disagree about this a lot, so some of us get angry and leave while others just cry. Until I came up with an idea that saved us from this problem, and I invented a game that we called a (choices game) that was fair to everyone, each of us suggests the game that they want. Then we all line-up and one of us begins to count as if we were playing the game (hide and seek). and wherever the count ends, it stops with them pointing at the game that we will play.

We played it together and then return to counting again, excluding those who were chosen before. We remained to play until all the games were over. It was a simple and smart solution to this annoying problem despite its smallness. And everyone accepted it and accepted its results whatever it was and played the game that has been chosen. We remained like this until new neighbors moved next to us. They only had a daughter. There was a strange connection between me and her. I did not know its meaning or what it is.

But I liked it without reasons.

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Theater of Childhood & Life (2)

I was young. Also, my brain was young. my aspirations. and my thoughts on life .. a lot of things were not in my calculations. because the little ones do not know what it means to be old.

I always wished to grow up quickly and join the university. I always thought that everything in the world is going as smoothly as the world that I created. with steady and arranged steps.. As easy as “one .. two .. three” .. nothing will hinder it.

My world was simple, beautiful, and big. you can only hear in it the pure, pure laughter from the hearts of children. My world, which is neither in heaven nor on the earth. It was in my heart. But I lost it without feeling. I lost myself in the thin line between genius and insanity, love and hate, right and wrong, without mixing.

There was nothing left for me from it except the beautiful memories and nostalgia that return to me whenever I drink coffee, everything had its own taste that I still feel in my mouth, and everything had its own touch that I still feel in my skin, so many things around us have changed. Even the way My mom made “dumplings” changed, and the perfume my grandmother used to wear also changed.

My childhood was fun. How much I liked playing in the rain in the winter! My mom used to make a coat of “plastic bags” for me. She used to cut two holes for the arms and an opening for the head and put them on to play in the rain without getting wet. I liked catching raindrops with my mouth, and every winter I used to close the drainage hole on the roof with everything that I got with my small hands, hoping that the surface would be filled with water, and it was already full, but it never reached the level I had hoped for. My wooden boat never sailed or floated over that water. But I never gave up and was not tired of repeating that every winter, despite the sanctions and reprimands.

I had the consolation that I would dream about a day In which water raises my wooden boat from the ground. That boat represented all my dreams.

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Theater of Childhood & Life (1)

I sit on my sofa.. near my window .. and drink my coffee.

I don’t like coffee, but something drives me to sip it.

My window crashes with raindrops so that it sings me to the dregs .. Winter .. Anything worse in winter than drinking coffee?!

It reminds me of Turkey and France, it makes me feel cold in my back, and it makes me goosebumps … and anything in the winter is better than cinnamon flavored tea?

My teapot is boiling over my heater. I hate winter! But it tempts me to write, my memories take me back five years ago … ten years ago …  fifteen years ago and more … My memories bring me back to beautiful days when I was short, and my childhood voice, my memory brings me back to the days when I made my own world in which no one knows anything about it. No one has entered my world. I remembered many things that I had forgotten, some of them I chose to forget about it voluntarily.

The most beautiful of those days was that I began to remember playing in the street in front of the house that we lived in for many years, I spent more time on that street more than I had inside the house, I learned from it more than what schools taught me, and I played in it as I did not do anywhere else, it testified to all the details of my life, it was a laboratory for my experiences and inventions, it embraced my hopes and dreams, it was a well for my secrets and a repository of my childish disasters, I said in it what I wanted and did what I wanted without thinking about the punishment or reprimand, I’ve hidden in it my small mistakes when I thought they were as big as crimes.

And now, after all these years, I still remember the colors of the walls and I still hear echoes of my songs.

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A Nation’s Diary (2)

2019: I was told that my brother was a courageous man and that he was walking and chanting behind my father. My father, my grandfather, my father’s grandfather, and my grandfather’s grandfather all came back home. But my brother didn’t.
My brother, my cousin, and a friend of theirs along with their colleagues revolted. They kept chanting: “Peaceful, peaceful.”
They had a principle they did not abandon.
They were told that their demands will be served and a decent life will be granted and that they should return to their homes, but they refused to return until they become sure that they were told the truth.
they have been betrayed and killed. They killed my brother, my cousin, and their friend and colleagues.

They threw their bodies in the river. I was told that our river has been always honest. The Nile refused to hide their bodies.

I was told that the one who killed them was looking just like us. Same color and features, and his tongue was uttering our same words and tongues. Words we knew and spoke.

#IAmTheSudanRevolution

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A Nation’s Diary (1)

1900: I was told that my grandfather’s grandfather was a brave man, a strong warrior. But he was killed by someone’s grandfather. They say that his killer was white-skinned blond with blue eyes and that his tongue was uttering words we did not know before.

1956: I was told that my father’s grandfather was a courageous fighter, he fought for the homeland and called for (the right to self-determination) and continued to struggle until the homeland gained independence.

1985: I was told that my grandfather was a brave man who loved the soil of the homeland, but the burden of poverty and fear for a living were stronger than him and subjected him to a bitter reality that would not have satisfied him without his fear for the fate of his children.

2018: I was told that my father was a brave man and that he went out in the morning to buy me a piece of bread to block my hunger, but the price of the bread was above his capacity. He only wanted one piece but he could not get it. He was deeply saddened to remember his hungry son, his father’s patience for his sake, his grandfather, who struggled for the homeland, and his father, who had died for the homeland. His grief became the fuel of his will, which was extinguished by oppression. He ended up walking the street yelling: “Freedom, peace, and justice.

#IamtheSudaneseRevolution